Research assistant gig with Tucker Max

I just signed on to do a major book project, something unlike anything else I have ever written. I need to hire a research assistant to help me with it. Anyone can apply for the job--I don't care about your resume or educational background, I only care about finding the most effective person for the job. If you are interested, read this entire post, then follow the instructions at the bottom to start the process.
Requirements for the gig:
-You can live anywhere in the world
-English must be your native language
-You must have constant and reliable computer and internet access
-Must be very intelligent, hard working, organized, and industrious
-You must be able to start by Feb 1st, and must be able to commit to the project until at least August 1st. The majority of the high time-commitment work will be between March 1st and June 1st.
-You must have a flexible enough schedule that you can adjust to varying time requirements. I estimate that the job will average 5-10 hours of work per week for 6 months, with some weeks having no work, while a few others may require 40+ hours of work. -This is not intended to be a full time job, and the work can be done around a conventional, 9-5 schedule.
The primary tasks the gig will entail: -Transcribing audio and video taped interviews into text. This will be the primary responsibility and take the majority of the time. I estimate about 40-50 hours of total tape will need to be transcribed. -Researching, collecting and organizing information (mainly biographical information about famous people). All research can be done from a computer using public, internet accessible sources. -Other "assistant" type tasks, for example: scheduling travel, finding and vetting various freelancers (camera operators, designers, etc), or setting interview appointments. What the job will NOT entail: -Partying with me, hanging out with me, or having sex with me. -Meeting me in person is not even required to do the job, and may never happen.
Reasons to do the gig:
-It IS a paid job. It does not pay a huge amount, and the pay will depend on several factors, mainly whether or not one person can handle this project, or if I have to divide the work between multiple people. If selected, you can expect at least a few hundred, and at most a few thousand dollars in payment.
-It is definitely something you will be able to put on your resume or CV and use to get other gigs/jobs.
-It will be pretty cool and interesting work. The audio tapes you will transcribe will be interviews with interesting and famous people, and the research will not be boring.
-This is a one-off gig, NOT a full-time, long-term job. But, it could lead to a full-time assistant job with me, if that arrangement makes sense for both of us. My current assistant is moving up and co-founding a start-up, and I will need to replace him at some point this year.
-You will learn a lot of skills you can leverage into other areas, and make connections you can use to advance your life and career. My four previous assistants all started working for me on on one-off projects like this, went into full time employment, then moved on to do awesome shit after working with me; Ryan Holiday became the marketing director for American Apparel and is now writing a book, Charlie Hoehn has worked for Tim Ferriss, Ramit Sethi, Seth Godin and wrote his own book, Ian Claudius is working on a new publishing start-up, and Jeff Waldman did this cool project with Kickstarter.
Reasons NOT to do the gig:
-If you think this is how you can get to drink and party with Tucker Max
-If you think you can skate through this without actually doing much and then brag to your friends you worked with Tucker Max -If you think this will make you Tucker Max's best friend for life because you are just so similar to him and wouldn't that be fun lol?!?!
HOW TO APPLY FOR THE RESEARCH ASSISTANT GIG:
Because I am screening remotely and not meeting people in person for this job, this will be a three stage application process. The first step is very simple and easy, and will test whether or not you can follow instructions, which will be crucial in these tasks. If you want to apply for the job, do these things:
UPDATE: Due to overwhelming volume, the gig is now closed to new applications.   Over 4,000 emails in less than two days will do that. If you already sent an application email in, you're fine. Most second round invitations have been sent out; the rest will go out tomorrow or Friday.